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Re: Call of Darkness
Chapter 5 Strangely, I couldn’t hear the demons anymore. I opened my eyes, and flinched in surprise. I wasn’t in a warehouse anymore, I was in a cave. A stone ...
Feb 5, 2007 -
Re: Gypsie Eyes
Huh, wow. I need to give myself more credit on my critiqueing abilities I guess. It seems I was more helpful than I thought. Thanks for the compliments. Chapter 2 ...
Nov 19, 2006 -
Re: Call of Darkness
Areoman, when does he talk to himself? He thinks to himself, and makes the occasional comment to the reader, but as far as I can remember he doesn't actually talk ...
Oct 29, 2006 -
Re: Eldest
(Note: more possible spoilers) Well, since you've already let out some spoilers (which people can skip over thanks to your warning), I think I'll comeent on them. For those of ...
Oct 15, 2006 -
Re: Call of Darkness
A little note: I've combined chapters 2 and 3, and taken out the dream sequence at the end of what was chapter 3. If you liked that scene, let me ...
Oct 12, 2006 -
Re: Call of Darkness
Thank you Myth, for the critiques and being a solid supporter of my work. I shall get to critiqueing "Oracle's Possesion", at least the first part tomorrow. My little way ...
Sep 30, 2006 -
Re: The Hunt (Part 1)
Hehe..yeah. Well, that gets revealed shortly. In part two if I remember correctly how I divided it. As to the drama, I'll be toneing that down in the edited version, ...
Sep 28, 2006 -
Re: The Hunt (Part 1)
Snoink, that is a fine example of constructive critisism. And I thought I'd though it out better. Your first comment, upon further review, does make sense. As to your suggestion, ...
Sep 27, 2006 -
Re: A Beginning....one of many
Man, I don't know how you could get bored with an idea that quickly. Heck this is better than most beginnings I've written, and you do this all the time? ...
Sep 27, 2006 -
Re: Call of Darkness
A little note: These chapters are intentionally short, so you're not likely to get a great deal of information per chapter. Basically, he's telling you what he knew when, which ...
Sep 27, 2006 -
Re: The Black Wolf
Okay, it doesn't need to be months and months. A single month from first meeting to "becoming one in body in soul" would be far more believable. And you don't ...
Sep 17, 2006 -
Re: The Black Wolf
The start of the second part seemed off to me. Why would kissing a dog be seen as animal cruelty? How could a kiss possibly constitute cruelty? I'm completely lost ...
Sep 17, 2006 -
Re: Call of Darkness
Chapter 2 My blood was black. Snapping out of my numbness, I covered the finger so I wouldn’t bleed on anything. Why in the hell was my blood black? Last ...
Sep 12, 2006 -
Re: Call of Darkness
Heh, Sureal, thanks for bringing that up. There should be emphasis there. Thanks for the crit Imp! You brought out several goods points I somehow managed to miss. About the ...
Sep 10, 2006 -
Re: The Enigma War. Chap. 1-2
Chapter 2 The week went by as any other week did. There were the occasional patrols, training exercises (which Sharon truly found boring), and the usual gossip. The only thing ...
Sep 7, 2006
